Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Creative Outlets

I was already thinking of change before Otis Redding's "Change Gonna Come" started playing through the shop's computer. I was thinking of how things are always changing when you don't want them to and nothing seems to change when you are dying for something to change. Sure you can "visualize" it or "make" it, but in my experience change comes in two main ways: completely out of the blue with no warning or preparation and in small, invisible doses so that it's impossible to see the change happening and it can only be observed after the change has occurred. Much like a Supernova I suppose, but way less dramatic.

I began this blog what seems like ages ago as conduit for professional change. I had a 5 year old daughter who was entering school and a part time job that gave me overtime stress. I needed something tangible, something creative to do and make. That thing was making pies, which has always been a relaxing, introspective activity for me. Not-so-slowly that turned into the shop, which of course turned into work and now I'm back here looking for another change. Prepping vegetables, reading about food, planning menus and working out recipes every day has done what I never thought possible to my brain. It's made it a little bored of food. I'm oversaturated with thoughts, images and ideas of food. Filled to the brim with braised meats and vegetable tarts. I need to think about something else on a regular basis. I need a new happy place.

Oh, I still love kitchens, tables, beautiful dishes and the smells of a good kitchen. I love all the great stuff that food can do for a body and mind, not to mention a group of friends. Blame it on astrology, if you like. As an Aquarius I'm an idea person. I love planning big plans and here I am mired in the actual details. Who would have thought? So I do what one does when change is needed and none seems to be coming. Find an outlet, some way of incorporating the aspects I'm missing into the life I'm actually leading. Filling in the hard spaces with squishy inspirations. I can't tell you what this blog is about to become. My best guess is that it will be a digital mirror on my current obsessions and crazy ideas. I don't doubt you will find food here in one way or another as it's been the one constant of my work life since I was a teenager. Some ramblings about working in the food and beverage industry while raising a child and maintaining some semblance of married life, maybe just some pictures of pretty stuff I found on the internet. I suspect, though, that it will be a series of invisible, imperceptible variations that someday result in something different than what it is now. Or what I am now.

Now, excuse me while I enter today's happy place...

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